Mister Scoops' MEAT LAND

More 2009 stuff.

2012-02-10T20:20:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

I used to rock a little.

2012-02-01T16:49:00.000-08:00

One of the first recordings I ever made. I'm going to release all of this shit I have lying around, if only to serve as an example of how styles evolve.

Don't waste my fuck'n time again.

2012-01-28T10:31:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

I lost this shit in 2009.

2012-01-19T19:54:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

Monday, stop being racist all the time.

2012-01-12T21:56:00.000-08:00

I'm not really Asian, you guys.

2012-01-04T03:02:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

Domestic violence.

2012-01-02T13:23:00.001-08:00

NINE TEEN COCKS.

2012-01-02T11:37:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

Sexual tyrannosaur.

2012-01-01T19:43:00.000-08:00

Tyrannus did this sweet dubstep remix of Da Hammer.
Check his shit out here.

Dog butt.

2012-01-01T17:01:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

Let's make it. A dance.

2011-12-31T06:09:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

Free to do what they tell you.

2011-12-26T05:34:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

The voice is Bill Hicks, the face is Bill Maher.
It's straight on some Milli Vanilli shit.

Totally hypothetical.

2011-12-20T20:01:00.000-08:00

Vocoders 'n shit.

2011-12-18T05:43:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

But not really.

2011-12-09T03:24:00.000-08:00

Barack Leucoma.

2011-12-08T21:50:00.000-08:00

I'm in training.

2011-12-01T20:25:00.000-08:00

I have incredibly limited time for my projects these days, so I'm trying to force myself to get in the habit of utilizing every second I get. I designed a whole battery of super sophisticated training exercises. In this test: I gave myself a 2 hour time limit to make a song and music video. It had to be at least 60 seconds in length, and include "YO IM ABOUT TO EAT" somewhere. This was the result, at just under an hour and 25 minutes.

Clue.

2011-11-23T01:35:00.001-08:00

Get it here.

Won't stop til that old money money get made.

2011-11-22T16:26:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

Listen, you loopy cunt...

2011-11-21T19:47:00.000-08:00

Get it here.

Get it right.

2011-11-21T01:17:00.001-08:00

Ching Chong.

2011-11-12T06:53:00.000-08:00

Doctor Robot.

2011-10-21T16:58:00.000-07:00

Get it here.

God in a cave.

2011-10-08T15:13:00.000-07:00

Get it here.

Brokedown.

2011-10-08T13:25:00.000-07:00

&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;br&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;

Get it here.

Kill everyone now.

2011-10-07T23:57:00.000-07:00

Get it here.

Playtime is serious business.

2011-08-05T18:14:00.000-07:00

" name="Playtime." border="0" />

Forgot I did these,

2011-07-31T01:05:00.000-07:00

Viral Marketing Fail. Goddamnit.

Rozz cannot fuck with Omar Little.

2011-07-30T21:46:00.000-07:00

She could, however, murder those skanky bikini bitches.

Furries.

2011-06-21T13:23:00.000-07:00

Got another package from the Nick Raciti the other day...

The package also contained something so fucking awesome, that you fags aren't ready yet. Hopefully you'll be ready soon. Like, in a week.

I forget about old shit.

2011-06-11T13:10:00.001-07:00

A "debate".

2011-06-10T15:51:00.000-07:00

You can't use the bible as evidence of god's existence, and expect people not to take it literally. If something is not literal, it's not evidence.

"I don't believe in god, there's no evidence to support the idea."
"Sure there is! Read this book. It's the word of god, what better proof could there be?"
"...wait. It says here in Leviticus, that insects have 4 legs, and that unicorns are real..."
"No, no, no. Your taking it too literally. It wasn't meant to be interpreted that way."
"How should I interpret it?"
"Look, god works in mysterious w..."
"Faggot."

I have powers.

2011-06-08T18:26:00.000-07:00

I have the incredible ability to identify a christian simply by studying facial features. I can walk into a crowded room, and within moments, I will have located the enemy. It's an easy technique to master, once you realize that delusional cunts are genetically predisposed to be delusional cunts. They have barely discernible deformities of the face, mostly in the folds of the eye region. Kind of like a Downy, but less severe than a full blown Mongoloid. They haven't evolved enough yet to anonymously dwell amongst the rest of us. I like to call this condition: "The Christ Face".

Anyway, I'm broke as fuck, and I hate my job. I was thinking about taking my special gift on the road, maybe writing a book, i don't know. I mean, there's a market for everything, there has to be a way to capitalize on an incredible gift like this. Kid's birthday parties, secret operative for a militant Muslim group, guest spots on television and radio talk shows... someone has to have a use for this. I just sent a lengthy email to Animal Planet, proposing a wildlife documentary called "Walking With Christians". Some of those things got really good CGI effects. Did you see that one about the ancient sea-faring reptiles?

Sippy Cup

2011-05-15T07:32:00.000-07:00

It's a dramatic web comic about friendship. And retards.
Check it out here.

Cricket Heads.

2011-05-11T15:19:00.000-07:00

I started a forum. It's gonna be THE place where all the cool artists get together and make art, film, and games. If you make cool shit, or just want to watch other cunts make cool shit:

Cricket Heads

Look out! The Pinks are gonna jog at you.

2011-04-03T00:33:00.000-07:00

"The Pinks" is a little game featuring little pink assholes. Out of the bazillion things I'm working on, it is the closest to being done. Imagine thousands of little pink assholes all running at you and shit. Now imagine your shooting at the little pink assholes. Now... what if you were a little pink asshole? What if the whole fuck'n world was a little pink asshole made out of little pink assholes holding hands?

Oh yeah, Discerpo is still coming along. I'm spending a lot of time fleshing out a more awesome story.

The ER: Putting YOU in the captain's seat.

2011-03-30T16:01:00.000-07:00

I spent the day in the ER getting pumped full of steroids and antibiotics via IV. Then I had to sit through a CAT scan, and pissed the technician off when he had to keep starting it over everytime I pissed myself laughing at the stupid robot-lady recording.

Robot-lady Recording: "Breathe in. Hold your breath. Do NOT swallow. *BRRRRRRRRRRRRR*"

Me: "Holy shit! What the fuck was that?!"

Technician: "Dude. I need you to remain completely still, ok?"

Me: "Sorry. You didn't tell me the thing was gonna start talking to me."

Technician: "Let's try again."

Robot-lady Recording: "Breathe in. Hold your breath. Do NOT swallow. *BRRRRRRRRRRRRR*"

Me: "Computer, status report on reactor six, please."

Technician: "Are you gonna be OK with this, man?"

Me: "I came in here looking for antibiotics, and you guys gave me a ride in this way-cool spaceship."

Income tax, smincome shmax.

2011-02-15T20:38:00.000-08:00

I finally broke down and bought a new scanner with the hundreds of thousands of dollars that Obama owed me. Remember how way back in the day I did comic strips and animation? Well, thanks to the reliable selflessness of the government, instead of more depleted uranium ammunition being pumped into the broken bodies of Iraqi civilians, I get to produce more of my shitty art.

The Music of 2010

2011-02-09T20:46:00.000-08:00

Since my piece of shit desktop PC melted down a while ago, the almost completed Little Albert and Toyman albums were lost. The only survivors were the few songs I had the foresight to scatter across the internet. I have since started to rework both albums, but because my style is constantly changing, the new additions sound completely incompatible with the older songs. I also found a weird song called "Piss Pains" that I don't really recall recording. So it's here too.

Enjoy!

The Art of Nick Raciti

2011-02-09T19:00:00.000-08:00

If you don't know who Nick Raciti is, you must be hanging out on the gay parts of the internet.

I'll be using the awesome Bronson for the cover art for my Paul Kersey themed hardcore glitch album that you didn't know about until just now.

Hungry Hungry Homos

2011-01-24T22:17:00.000-08:00

Experiments.

2011-01-18T04:02:00.000-08:00

As I was working on my games, I realized I could make software to get some of those visual effects I had planned for Dying Eye and all those other short films I've been sitting on.

In this case it extracts frames from a video file, applies coloring/alpha/scaling effects, and plays the frames back in random sequence. Most importantly, it does it all in realtime. None of that buffering for 5 minutes everytime I want to preview any changes in After Effects foolishness.

Examples:

Update! Seizure Demonic

2010-12-19T01:40:00.000-08:00

It's a screensaver designed to summon the ancient demons of epilepsy.

*UPDATE*
I fixed it by getting rid of the gay installer, fixing the mouse shit, and adding randomly generated noises and colors.

Download it, faggot.

Leave me a comment and let me know if everything works. Or doesn't.

Sometimes I copy/paste myself into my blog when I say something really witty.

2010-11-30T13:01:00.000-08:00

This age is totally gay. It's a bad time to be 30. If I was 30 back in like the 70s, it would have been really really awesome. In the 70s there was music and art and revolution. Now it's just technology and fat idiots. I love technology, but I hate idiots. Especially fat idiots. Fat idiots can suck my cock. I wish this was the 70's, and I was as 30 and knowledgeable as I am now about the fat idiot future, and I had technology. I would couple my knowledge and technology together, and create a marriage of knowledgeable technology to aid me in my revolution against the future. Fuck you, present. I hope the present collapses beneath the weight of fat and stupidity. And then I'll lean in, and take it's hand, and make like I'm going to help it up off the floor. And right when the present is about half way to it's feet, gushingly thanking me for all the really great help, I would go "WHOA! Sorry about that, chief!", and let go of it's hand. It would fall back to the floor and feel real dumb for ever having trusted me. And then I would call the present a faggot, and steal it's place in line at the buffet. The buffet of life.

I want the noises to be all like: "WOOOOOOGAAH!"

2010-11-22T13:27:00.000-08:00

This is a shitload of atmosphere loops for Discerpo, before compression. There will be multiple sound emitters located randomly throughout the environment, each playing a random loop. With the 3D positional sound shit, the soundscape will be constantly changing as you walk around.

In the initial WAV format, these loops combined weighed in at about 90 megs. I downsampled them from 16 bit stereo to 8 bit mono, and now they take up about 2.5 megs. The quality was substantially sacrificed in the process, but with the game's reverb effect, and all around lo-fi nature, it actually works better. I love the muffled grain of a low bitrate.

Imagine an environment and plot as garbled as this audio, and you'll get an idea of what my shit is all about.

It's in 3D now, dickhead.

2010-11-22T00:48:00.000-08:00

Look'n good, bro. Look'n sharp.

Ignore the floor texture. The floor texture sucks.

I didn't put in the coloring, decals, or any of the other effects yet. That's why it's all greyscale and everything. The torn fabric shit will be semi-transparent.

So, this is my system:

1. Each texture is a set of no less than 6 subimages. Meaning there are at least 6 versions of each texture. The game chooses what version to use and where at random. You know, so you don't end up walking down a hallway and see the same 128x128 texture repeated over and over. Like Halo. I hate Halo. I don't understand how asshole game companies get a bazillion dollars to build a game with, and they can't bother to make a few more textures and incorporate the tiny line of code that can make the game environment significantly more awesome. If the concern is filespace, keep reading.

2. The game has a bin of "decals". These are posters, stickers, paint splashes, cracks, etc. The game places these in random places, with a random size, color, and angle. This is probably the most important part of keeping the game environment significantly more awesome. The game has 64 decals now, which is probably overkill. I'm going to double it to 128 decals by the time I'm done, just cuz that's the number I had planned on.

3. I already told you in a previous post about how the critters are all made out of random pieces, so no 2 are alike. This is still the case.

4. There is no music, only atmosphere. I always turn the music off on games. Especially moody ones like this. I have so many sounds and ambient loops, I'm not sure which to use yet. I'm treating sounds in the same manner as the graphics. Each sound will have (still not sure) 8? variations. This is the only place I am concerned about file space, audio is a lot harder to compress and still retain quality than images. At any rate, the sound will be the best part of the game.

5. File space. Pay attention. Bungie, sit your faggot ass next to Rockstar Games, shut up, and maybe both you cunts can make your gay crap better. Indexed Color. It's how you take a 2 meg BMP of 500000 colors, and turn it into a 8kb GIF of 16 colors. And it looks the same. I figured this out back in the day while playing Vice City. I was walking down some street looking for trouble, when I noticed how incredibly shitty the textures looked. The signs were barely readable. It was almost as if somebody had decided it was a good idea to use 32x32 textures. It looked worse than the pixelization you get from walking across a wall in Wolfenstein 3D with your face. And for some reason I needed to upgrade my video card to play this bullshit? If they had simply used INDEXED COLOR, the fucking textures could have been roughly 4x the dimensions with the same file size.

6. You will not need to upgrade your shit. I'm making the game on a pretty standard machine. Anything that makes the frame rate drop from 30 fps to 29 will get it's ass kicked until the frame rate is at 30 again. The game is intentionally lo-fi, so it will probably run great on your microwave's OS if you know what your doing.

That's how I'm making the game. Your all like: "What the fuck is the game?", and I'm all like: "This blog was really really long, and I don't have time for this shit right now.".

Next time:
How I made a city out of junked trains and shipping containers. And maybe some play mechanics and story.

Listen, you backwoods country fuck...

2010-11-17T20:07:00.000-08:00

So like, Discerpo was originally intended to be in first person 3D. And then after a month of fucking around, I decided to give up on 3D, because the whole idea of a third dimension is witchcraft. Every time I try to understand what the fuck a second "Z coordinate" does, I shit the bed. It wouldn't be so bad if I slept alone... start my day off with a healthy breakfast, listening to the gentle thrum of sheets adrift in the washing machine. I'm married. I have to jump up: "OH, MAN! I can't believe our fucking kids would do this to us! Look at this mess! How did they even sneak in here without triggering our sophisticated security shit that we don't really have that I'm just coming up with as I type in my blog because it's 11:31 PM, and I have to get up at 4AM for work and I'm too freaked out about all the child feces to sleep anyway, so what the fuck?!", and then my dog eats it. My dog eats the child feces that is really my feces that I'm too ashamed to admit to. But not really.

Anyway, I got it all figured out, man. I got Z coordinates like you've never seen, son. These aren't your Mommy's or your sister's Z coordinates, either. No. These are Z coordinates you can mount a gun rack on. You could mount my Z coordinates on like... a leopard, sprint across the savanna, and take down the biggest fucking gazelle in all of Africa. I don't care if that gazelle has like a bamillion Z coordinates. I don't care if that gazelle's bamillion Z coordinates are mounted to the side of a fuck'n Apache helicopter. My Z coordinates will bring that scrawny legged quadruped faggot to the fucking dirt. And then I will fuck it. With the release of Discerpo in THREE FUCKING DEE. Which will come along a lot faster than pussy Discerpo two dee. Because I've been spending most of my time recycling the 3D textures I had already made into 2D gayness. God hates the gays. My Z coordinates will force god to his knees and make him suck my giant hetero cock. Suck that cock, god. Suck it, and leave all my homo friends alone. Let the lesbians scissor each other in quiet desperation. Let them look all sad and not sexy as they try to jump start a car battery by bumping two negatives together. You can probably eventually pound a square peg through a round hole, if you beat on it enough. Probably. But you can't put a hole in a hole. Unless you watch Star Trek and listen to all that bullshit science. Jordy was my favorite, because he was black.

The woods at night.

2010-10-25T18:38:00.000-07:00

With and without rain.

Actual pixel size, instead of trying to shrink the entire 1024px screen size into a pussy 600px Blogger column.

The grass and trees all twitch around independently, which fills the forest with frenetic energy. Actually, it wouldn't be a proper Scoops release unless every goddamn thing twitched and blinked like Michael J. Fox on a Saturday night.

The dude isn't "filled in" yet. He's just a basic template of the humanoid form Ill be building from. He's constructed from moving parts: A head, torso, 2 arms, and 2 legs. I'm doing this to overcome the limitations of animation, and for the ability for the game to mix various parts together to create random creatures. The problem I'm having at the moment is a realistic walk cycle. I have a solution, but I'm not sure the effort is worth the result. Hold on a sec... *emails Zach*

Next up: let's go indoors and see some... indoor shit.

Discerpo.

2010-10-21T20:39:00.000-07:00

The amazing environmental randomization of Discerpo.

A quick example room, played 4 times.

Every time you play: the colors, textures, decals, flora, whatever, are different.
All of the game's characters/critters are randomly generated from different parts, you'll never see the same shit twice.

Ignore the walls the windows are set into, I didn't code the random shit for them yet.

Next up: Weather effects, film grain, and hopefully some way cool monsters to show off.
(It's beginning to look a lot like Head Worms around here.)

I don't believe in dogs.

2010-10-10T16:30:00.000-07:00

I love Bobby Hacker.

2010-10-06T19:10:00.000-07:00

And when I say "love", I probably mean "lust". I'm not sure, I forget.

Jesus Sandals from bobby hacker on Vimeo.

Well goddamn...

2010-10-02T08:15:00.000-07:00

...and I was worried that the Bronson would be lost to the younger generations.
Not very fucking likely.

This game really needs a name.

2010-09-27T19:11:00.000-07:00

Jill is fucking pissed.

Empty now, won't be soon.

YEEEEEAAH!

2010-09-22T12:24:00.001-07:00

My shit is getting AROUND, son. Charles fucking Bronson.
Check it.

All you stupid Christian cocksuckers out there:

2010-09-14T19:56:00.000-07:00

Shut the fuck up and learn something.

Mortally wounded, son.

2010-08-25T03:59:00.000-07:00

Randomly spurting trails of blood. Pretty nasty looking in motion.

Added foliage 'n shit, son.

2010-08-24T05:19:00.000-07:00

Make'n games'n shit.

2010-08-19T18:31:00.000-07:00

A Sperm Limit Law.

2010-08-18T12:43:00.000-07:00

My song "Make Sammiches" was used in this trippy animation:
A Sperm Limit Law
(It's the music after the title screen.)
Check it out, cuz it's fucking awesome.

Critters.

2010-05-27T13:39:00.000-07:00

I get bored at work and make shit.

Mister Scoops' MEAT LAND

More 2009 stuff.

I used to rock a little.

Don't waste my fuck'n time again.

I lost this shit in 2009.

Monday, stop being racist all the time.

I'm not really Asian, you guys.

Domestic violence.

NINE TEEN COCKS.

Sexual tyrannosaur.

Dog butt.

Let's make it. A dance.

Free to do what they tell you.

Totally hypothetical.

Vocoders 'n shit.

But not really.

Barack Leucoma.

I'm in training.

Clue.

Won't stop til that old money money get made.

Listen, you loopy cunt...

Get it right.

Ching Chong.

Doctor Robot.

God in a cave.

Brokedown.

Kill everyone now.

Playtime is serious business.

Forgot I did these,

Rozz cannot fuck with Omar Little.

Furries.

I forget about old shit.

A "debate".

I have powers.

Sippy Cup

Cricket Heads.

Look out! The Pinks are gonna jog at you.

The ER: Putting YOU in the captain's seat.

Income tax, smincome shmax.

The Music of 2010

The Art of Nick Raciti

Hungry Hungry Homos

Experiments.

*Update!* Seizure Demonic

Sometimes I copy/paste myself into my blog when I say something really witty.

I want the noises to be all like: "WOOOOOOGAAH!"

It's in 3D now, dickhead.

Listen, you backwoods country fuck...

The woods at night.

Discerpo.

I don't believe in dogs.

I love Bobby Hacker.

Well goddamn...

This game really needs a name.

YEEEEEAAH!

All you stupid Christian cocksuckers out there:

Mortally wounded, son.

Added foliage 'n shit, son.

Make'n games'n shit.

A Sperm Limit Law.

Critters.

Update! Seizure Demonic